Friday, July 7, 2017

Bullying... not cool guys.

Everyone has been asking me about bullying since the previews for Wonder have come out. 
Honestly I was seriously never bullied that I can remember. 
In elementary school I had nurses and friends who protected me. I can never thank them enough for keeping me oblivious to bullying because I know for a fact it would have affected me in such a hard way. 
Another thing that helped was the first day of school I would always skip and my mom would go in and meet my class and explain to them who I was and what Treacher Collins Syndrome was. She would also explain that I was normal as everyone else I had lots of family and I loved to do anything that any other kid would. 
So When I had my first day it was like everyone already knew me. Made it a lot easier to make friends. 
However when I moved to Utah in 5th grade (my only hard grade socially) it became so much harder. Utah I love it but people can be so exclusive and rude sometimes. And me being in fifth grade and a normal "tween" wanted to handle school on my own. My mom still came and explain which did help but I was on my own I didn't have a nurse or friends to protect me here. At first they'd tease me and harass me I talk to my teacher but that'd never help. I remember this one time I was walking the track just minding my own business when one of my first friends in fifth grade different class just came up and walked with me and we talked. Became a daily routine so grateful for her and her doing that. Honestly it took about 3 months for anyone in my own class to really talk to me. But once they did I started to feel included and not so alone sure some people were still jerks but I ignored them. 
After fifth grade school life wasn't so hard socially. (Educationally is a different story.) 
I learned to ignore the jerks, talk to everyone so they'd feel included, and answer questions when asked. I adapted to my surroundings sometimes I did become sassy but I can't control that just who I am. I honestly had the best time for the rest of my school career.
So if you are getting bullied stand up to them and ask them why? Ask them if they have any questions. I find half the people who stare or are jerks are afraid to ask the question they've been holding on to for so long. 
If you are the bully then stop and apologize. No need to be one anymore. 
Don't be exclusive talk to everyone and anyone. Makes sure no one feels alone. My general rule of thumb through out middle school and high school was to always invite everyone to your table or your hang out spot to never exclude. 
Utah I feel you need this the most I love you I do so so much. But be including do not close the circle of friends because you're comfortable. Make it wide and inviting so no one has to fight their way in to not feel lonely. 
Be uncomfortable because only then will you become comfortable. 
If you're the one feeling lonely then you fight to feel included fight the barriers of the circle heck get in the middle and just talk to everyone. Just do it I promise you; you will be included even if you're just listening. People will include you. 

2 comments:

  1. I'm learning more about you every day, my girl. Your advice is great, and can help so many. Thanks!

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  2. What a terrific example. This brings tears to my eyes. We are one big family, and when that realization comes to those ignorant of that fact, we will have peace.

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